Moments

     It doesn't seem possible that two years have gone by since Bruce's mom passed away. It also doesn't seem possible that I have not written anything for this blog since last year. I still cook. I still stand or sit with Mom's cookbooks in front of me, losing myself in memories...trying to recall moments from the past.

     "Moment" is an important word to me. When our boys were little,I would ask them, "What was your favorite moment?" It might be in reference to a special day or event such as a trip to a nearby zoo or a birthday celebration. Or it might be just be a day...a seemingly nothing special-ordinary-run-of-the-mill kind of day. I would do this because I found,and still find, that moments--those brief periods of time that become our most treasured memories--are usually small and slip by unnoticed unless we grab hold of them, write them down, talk about them. They come without planning or preparation. They come on the very best days of our lives and they come on,what may seem at the time as, the very worst days of our lives.

     The last few days of Mom's life were, as one would imagine, difficult. We didn't want her to go but we also knew that terrible pain and exhaustion were now her constant companions. There were times when I would sit alone by her bedside, touch her hand, listen to her labored breathing and wish that I could be anywhere else but here, in this moment.

     One particularly tough day, Mom was in terrible pain and began to moan in a way that made me jump from the chair in which I had been dozing and move immediatly to her side.

     "Mom, are you okay?" I asked, tears beginning to flow...again.

     She continued to moan, "Oh, oh, oh....."

     I started to reach for the call button...she's in terrible pain, I thought,...she needs help!

     Suddenly, without opening her eyes, she raised her hand just slightly, and finished what had begun as a cry of pain like this,

     "Give me an 'O'!"

    Startled by the sudden change from cries of pain to a cheerleader's chant, I began to laugh. She smiled, a quickly fleeting but absolutly there smile. Out from the depths of pain and painkilling drugs for just a second came Mom..funny,happy,quick-witted...Mom.

     There would be more pain...more tears to follow...but for an instant we were just a couple of women sharing a joke, a joyful moment that would be ours forever.

     I have told this story to family and friends. I'm telling it again here. I can share the story. I'm always happy to share the story..but the moment is mine...Mom's and mine.

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The following recipes and moments belong to Mom and others who shall remain nameless but they know who they are:

Toast Midgies

Ingredients:

Version I

Two pieces of buttered toast put together. Cut vertically in fourths and horizontally in half.  Makes 8 midgies.

Version II

Just butter[on toasted bread]. 1 E-W(horizontal) cut, 4-5 N-S cuts. yielding 8-10 total rectangles.